no regrets, coyote: Archive

Intended for fish:

herecomesinspiration: Knives? Check. Rope? Check. Dagger? Check. Chains? Check. Locks? Check. Laser Beams? Check. Acid? Check. Body Bag? Check. Shiv? Check. Pipe? Check. Hammer? Check. Axe? Check. Subject? Check. Location? Check. Desire? Check. Vengeance? Check. Swords? Check. Saws? Check. Clubs? Check. Claws? Check. Hatred? Check. Anger? Check. Mermaid? Check. Murder? Check.

Feb 1st

23 notes

“I’m fat like a pot belly pig that humped a dairy cow who gave birth to a...”

– My boss sent me this message. I love her.

Jan 31st

Jan 29th

2,537 notes

Looking at your crush,

davidgilmoursjuicybooty: champagnecalifornia: lightdisarmsyou: endlesslyunamusing: Expectations: Reality: ahahahahahaha oh my god this is fucking hysterical OMG OMG SPAGHETT this. spaghett about it I love Spaghett. T&E is one of my favourite shows ever. This is so true though.

Jan 29th

295 notes

Jan 29th

91 notes

Jan 29th

693 notes

Jan 29th

7,777 notes

Jan 27th

3 notes

My dad is watching Finnish Poker on tv right now (I know) and the announcers are English and trying to guess what is happening. The one announcer says “I know the Finnish language isn’t very exciting, but it’s designed to be heard well behind scarves covering the face due to the freezing cold” and the second announcer replies with “yeah, and vodka!”

Jan 27th

mooglemaniac asked: It took me a moment to realize who this was until I saw the icon. Hello there!!! Long time no chat :D (and your tumblr makes me giggle a whole bunch)

Jan 26th

“If I hate you so much why does it make me so sad?”

– Toki I never really understood this til now.

Jan 26th

1 tag

davidmilgour: always-fiddling-about replied to your post: mickmason replied to your post: I can hear… That gif. I’m dying. DO YOU LIKE IT mickmason replied to your post: WELL THEN GET A GODDAMN THING OF VASELINE OR SOMETHING You know I have some …But it’s in the …Bathroom… *snicker* GET IT GET IT GET IT CAUSE YOU KNOW POLLY BATHROOM CLEANER This is the funniest thing I have ever...

Jan 26th

1 tag

Jan 26th

18 notes

1 tag

I want to be in an early 1960’s type western/drama tv show. I wanna be the badass female bar owner named Miss Lindsey who keeps a shotgun behind the bar and a pistol strapped to my leg, but has hidden insecurities that the hero-man says “to poppycock with” and tells me I’m foolish and then kisses me hard on the mouth while I feign protesting.

Jan 26th

1 tag

Jan 25th

1 tag

Jan 25th

11 notes

1 tag

My dad just asked if my computer can play dvds. I told him that all computers can. This is now my dad

Jan 25th

Jan 24th

23 notes

Jan 23rd

31 notes

1 tag

Last Friday night me and some friends went out to a bar that just opened in town. I only had about an hour to drink before we went, so I drank like a newb/man just from the desert who found water. Needless to say, when we got to the bar I made a beeline for the bathroom and became very good friends with the toilet. My sister came to pick me up because I was very drunk, and very sick. She was...

Jan 23rd

156 notes

I’m driving with my parents to the States to go shopping, and my mom has her window open so she can smoke. I mentioned I was freezing in the back and my dad said that it was freezing inside the car. I then said that the doors are leaky and cold air comes in that way too. He then said that ‘it’s coming in the window’ and my mind said ‘and snatching your people...

Jan 22nd

1 tag

The Cremation of Sam McGee →

There are strange things done in the midnight sun by the men who moil for gold;The Arctic trails have their secret tales that would make your blood run cold;The Northern Lights have seen queer sights, but the queerest they ever did see was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge I cremated Sam McGee.

Jan 22nd

1 tag

Sometimes I love Canada

I always rag on Canada in the winter (come on, it’s like dead, freezing, tundra) but sometimes it can be really nice and I feel bad for people who don’t get to experience it. I was driving home from work tonight and I noticed how truly beautiful outside it was. It’s been so cold here lately (-18 degrees C right now, about 0 F) but it was a full moon tonight, and the sky was...

Jan 22nd

1 tag

My dad: Now that you’ve got that cast you’re going to have to start picking lots of fights. Me: Why? My dad: Imagine the elbows you’d be throwing!!! You’d be knocking people out like crazy! Me:

Jan 19th

Watch

This video is hilarious and it actually makes me think that John C. Reilly is sorta cute lol. I love these 4 forever.

Jan 19th

1 tag

I have the coolest cast ever you guys! As you probably don’t remember, a week and a half ago I fell and hurt my arm real bad. Since then I’ve had to go for xrays twice, and they’ve determined I fractured my elbow/arm. I got my cast tonight, and it is super cool. It was this fuzzy material the doctor got wet, and then he put it along the underside of my arm and wrapped my whole...

Jan 19th

This is an ADULT LINK. Click at your own risk; you... →

Jan 18th

80,928 notes

1 tag

Jan 18th

1 tag

Jan 18th

1 tag

My sister texted this to me this morning. “So I had the weirdest dream ever! I was at a metalocolypse concert and was front row and after the concert I was at a hardware store and pickles was there so we sat down and chatted mostly about how you love them and he drew me a sketch of skwisgaar and gave me an autograph that was wrote out for you.” WHY IS THIS NOT REAL LIFE?!?!?!

Jan 18th

1 tag

rogerwaters-: I keep looking up things about college and I’m just at a point right now where I’m like “can there just be a college for listening to Pink Floyd please?”

Jan 17th

10 notes

1 tag

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com →

This is my new favourite website, ever. I honestly don’t think I have ever laughed so hard in my entire life. I legit almost peed my pants. Go to it and look up whatever interests you, and you’ll thank me for showing you, after you’ve changed your pee pants.

Jan 13th

howlikeatree replied to your post:I’m watching Teen Wolf and my dad is sitting in… i’m laughing so hard rn omg He just doesn’t understand good film. He kept making sarcastic comments like “OH YEAH THIS IS A GREAT MOVIE :/” but he sat and watched the whole thing. I think he was secretly pretending that was him in high school. I did.

Jan 13th

1 tag

Jan 13th

10 notes

1 tag

I’m watching Teen Wolf and my dad is sitting in the living room and he keeps asking me why this is a good movie. I keep telling him it’s cuz he’s jealous that he’s not a teen wolf and that he doesn’t appreciate the subtle nuances that make this a good movie. This has been his face throughout the entire thing

Jan 13th

2 notes

1 tag